As a mother of a kindergartner and a 2nd grader, I cannot just move along with own little perfect life without stopping, acknowledging and grieving for the lives lost on Friday. While it should be a time to finish up Christmas shopping, bake holiday treats and celebrate the season, I feel stuck. All weekend we avoided the news and avoided any talk of this event, to protect our young children from this horrific nightmare. Last night, I felt compelled to talk to Tommy so that he wouldn't go to school this morning and hear rumors about the shooting. He is a very sensitive and I wanted him to know something was going on so he wouldn't be scared if kids started talking about it at school. I choked back the tears as I told him that innocent people were shot by a crazy person. He asked where and I cringed as I explained it was at a school and that children were killed. He asked how old the kids were. He asked how many. He asked if they got the guy. I explained that the shooter killed himself and he chuckled and asked why would he do that? This is something a 7 year old should never have to exposed to or try to understand. This something a 7 year old should never have to be scared of. All I could do is reassure him that it happened far away (yet it's not that far) and that he is safe.
Now that the kids are off to school today, I can't help but watch the news and see the details unfold about a community getting ready to handle the task of burying their children. I can't stop paying attention. I can't let it go, at least not today. I can't blog about parties and tell you about all the good things going on because it all just seems so trivial. So NOT important. I know we all need to keep moving forward with our lives and our normal routine, but how do we make sure that we aren't going to quickly forget about what happened to this community, not unlike our own?